Dear Heaven Angels
I don't know where you are right now; did you see me getting awake? I'm trying to hold myself back just because I’m not mad at anyone. These tears aren’t for joy or cooperation at all. I'm just stuck, as that’s what happens when I fall. Every time I tell myself it’s fine and smile, I wish I could see you for seconds. I don't know what to say right now; maybe I should get some sleep, but closing my eyes won’t close the case anyway. I’ll keep fighting my heart and emotions just to make you smile, but I am not real. My tears are still betraying me, and I can’t hide them, though I say everything is fine. I don't know how you see me right now—am I being brave, weak, or strong? I wish you could answer. I’ll be in denial of my tears for the rest of my life, just to make you proud. But even though you told me nothing, what about the plans you made for me? I won’t lose everything, but at least I’ll let you see that I can win. It’s bad that ...